sahabat ana!!

Sunday, June 5, 2011

silent LOVE!

Salam alaikum..

Guys, firstly.. thanks for still reading, although I know, all my post are making you even more boring than ever.. its okay for you if you don`t want to read this.. I think it is not important to you.. as I thought its important for me.. as I`m going to write about the person that I love..

My lovely abah..

Abah.. as I wrote this for you, its okay if you don`t know this.. but well, you must know, that I really love you abah! Just like I know you love me even though you have never said it.. you have never whispered it to my barely ears just like what ibu have once done that.. well, that is love right? We don’t have to say it through our sense.. we know it from heart!

I know abah, you love us.. even though plenty of us doesn`t want you to be our abah.. I have heard it, most of the time.. my brother saying that, my sister saying this, and bla,bla,bla.. we are just complaining about what we don`t know actually.. its coincide with what the Arabian`s intelligence once said, man actually make what they don’t know as an enemy..

Well abah, as your last son.. I know, and I can see.. sometime you make us mad.. sometime I can see, kak ya making his face, abg abul frequently doesn’t agree with what you decided.. abg husni talking about you to me as its releasing his mad feeling toward you… thats and many more including your beloved last daughter and last children, maisarah.. i`m sorry abah, as we cant see your love.. because I know.. your love is like the sun.. its too shiny until we as children can`t look toward it… its hot sometime but I know.. its needed.. as we will be going astray if you`re not..

And abah, if i`m capable to do it, I would love to show to everyone, especially our family.. that you are very lovely!

Abah, I remember that morning, when maisarah asking for you permission to go hang out with her friend.. I remember how your face change that morning. And that morning is enough to show to her that you love her.. how you concerned about her.. but, he doesn’t want to listen.. and he started to cry.. and she then come to my room and said, “hairi! Ak tau ko nk kluar jugak.. pegi ckp dngan abah.. aku tau musti ko dpt kluar..”. well bah, she always said that you love me more.. and because of I don`t want she to get upset with you, I cancelled my decision.. I don’t even go to you because yes I know you will permit me to go.. because im your SON.. she is your DAUGHTER.. its dangerous.. I know abah.. then you go to work while maisarah has not stop her cry yet..

And I remember how happy maisarah is when she heard you permited her to go.. I know bah, you don’t want her to cry.. I know!

And that evening I can see your fear in your eyes when sarah hasn`t yet come home.. its 6.45 and I saw you sleep outside waiting for sarah.. I saw all that abah!..

And bah, I can`t deny.. im felling melancholy.. for almost everytime you are there watching tv, we would get away from there, leaving you alone watching it.. I can see you are alone! You always talking with childrens and talking about old man thing.. and I know you know that they aren’t listening.. but you need companion to be talk with.. why not us? Because we would not listen..

lonely little heart..

Well i`m pretty sure, if we know how much you love us, there will be no more complaint from us.. sorry for cannot see your silent love.. I LOVE YOU ABAH!!

ill always pray to god to put you always in happiness ABAH!

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